The storm before the calm

Why is it that my kids pick worst times lose their minds and act like they have no sense?  I mean, it’s one thing when they do it when we are by ourselves, alone in our house.  But lately, they haven’t been a bit shy about losing it in public places.  Like the grocery store check out.  The bathroom at Michaels.  The LIBRARY.  Yeah...that was fun.  I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to take them back there for a very long time.  Tonight, they let loose in front of Grandma Rita.  It’s not the first time, but tonight was particularly exhausting for me.  I know we are all feeling a little anxious because Pat and I are going out of town for several days.  I don’t leave the kids often overnight.  Maybe that’s why it felt like they went manic.  Our house was loud.  They wouldn’t stop screaming, running, yelling or fighting with each other.  I was trying not to yell. To be patient and understanding.  But my patience wore thin very quickly.  I was tired.  I’d been up since 5 am., but ended up taking the morning off because of the snow.  I used my ‘time off’ wisely - I did three loads of laundry, cleaned, changed sheets, shoveled 5-6 inches of snow off of our driveway and then worked 4.5 hours.  I was pretty tired after work.  By the time the kids had eaten dinner and gotten a bath, I was pretty much done in.  And I hadn’t even packed for my trip yet.  Bedtime came and all hell seemed to break loose.   Mitch wouldn’t sleep.  Evie wouldn’t sleep.  They both started screaming and crying.  All the while, Grandma Rita was trying to sleep in the next room.  It was bad.  And pretty darn embarrassing.  I’m sure didn’t handle it the best was that I could have. 

I try so hard to be a good mom.  But sometimes it feels like the hardest job in the world.

My kids are good kids.  They really are.  They are kind and sensitive.  They love hard and play hard.  They are smart and funny and they fill my life with joy most days.  

But some days are harder than others. 

I guess should probably go pack.  Our flight leaves at 9.  

Even after all this, I’m going to miss these two kids like crazy.